The dresser in our bedroom is around eight feet away. I’m terrible with distances but it’s a big room. I’m awakened by my face slamming into the front of it. Regaining my senses, I mutter a prayer of thanks we chose rounded drawer pulls.
This is officially my least-favorite way of waking up.
I try to stand and my feet are using the front of the dresser as much as the vibrating floor. Earthquakes are rare in Pittsburgh but they happen. We’ve recently had some tremors north of the city but nothing like this.
“Really, Randy? Her?” Laura’s chilly voice comes from the bed.
I look up and see my dear, sweet Laura standing there naked and still asleep. The room is tilted like a carnival ride and I can only imagine what the house looks like. The bed breaks free of the carpet. She surfs it across the room at me.
I “Starsky & Hutch” across the bed and sweep her legs before it slams into the dresser. She hits the bed, wakes up, and the room falls horizontal again.
Living with a witch keeps you on your toes. The sex is amazing but the nightmares can be killer.